


almost love

by DarlingHazel



Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: Almost Domestic Fluff?, Best Friends, Crushes, Dorks in Love, Fluff, M/M, Mutual Pining, Pining, Romantic Fluff, hand holding
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-02
Updated: 2020-02-02
Packaged: 2021-02-28 03:01:43
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,437
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22526746
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DarlingHazel/pseuds/DarlingHazel
Summary: Steve notices a lot of things about Billy. They're always so close to something, but he's never sure what.He thinks it's almost love.
Relationships: Billy Hargrove/Steve Harrington
Comments: 22
Kudos: 135





	almost love

There’s the butt of a cigarette abandoned on the school floor as Steve makes his way through the hallways to get to class.

Billy must be skipping class today.

He can almost smell the smoke coming from the fresh cig, see the cloudy gray and feel Billy’s eyes on him with an almost-teasing smile.

It’s an English-free day. It makes sense that Billy would want to skip, if he had no reason to be there anyways.

But just because he’s skipping the first period, doesn’t mean he’s skipping school. Steve knows this.

He knows a lot about Billy. Notices more than he lets on.

Like how last week when they were drunk at midnight alone in Steve’s living room, Billy didn’t drink a lot. It meant he was happy, and he wanted to live out the moment.

The smell of perfume lingers on Steve from when he tried one of his mom’s last night, when him and Billy snuck through his parent’s bedroom (they were gone for the week again anyways) and played dress up.

It rolls off him stronger than his presence somehow, turns heads and makes the guys chuckle among themselves as Steve takes his place in his usual spot.

He doesn’t have to look back to know Billy’s not there. Doesn’t mind too much.

The teacher talks loudly. Steve knows Billy doesn’t quite like this one, she speaks like she’s reading from a script and looks at Billy funny. Steve notices it. He’s pretty sure it’s because Billy used to interrupt her back then, but Billy’s stopped.

Billy’s been a lot nicer. Steve noticed.

He likes to notice things about Billy, it makes him feel like they’re connected. In a way, they are.

Steve looks out the window boredly, chewing on his pen. Billy likes to look at him while he does that, Steve doesn’t know why but he doesn’t complain. Doesn’t mind those set of deep ocean eyes lingering for a little bit longer than what would be considered normal at his lips.

He’s not shy about it, he’s never shy about what he does around Billy and Billy’s never shy about what he stares at or says when with Steve. They’re bonded, in some way.

_“What’s your favorite color?”_

_Billy’s voice rang through the night as Steve and him laid on the rooftop, bodies so close but not quite touching as they looked up at the stars._

_“Maybe blue,” Steve answered._

_Shifting of clothes sounded from his right and he moved his head to find Billy shrugging himself out of the jacket lazily. “Why?” Billy asked._

_His eyes snapped up and caught Steve’s. In the moonlight, Steve could see some freckles forming on Billy that usually only came out in the brightest of sunlight. His usually tan skin looked more fair, made him look almost princely in the dead of night. His nose and cheeks were tinted red, a beautiful color, Steve decided._

_“Ever looked in the mirror, Billy?”_

_Billy gave a little lopsided grin and leaned in a bit, bumping their shoulders. That little bit of contact brought Steve some comfort. “All the time, why?”_

_“You ask that too much,” Steve noted._

_Billy just moved to his side and faced Steve. “You know, the stars are up there,” Steve said._

_His smile softened to a whisper._

_“I know. Why is blue your favorite color?”_

_Steve guessed he couldn’t really tip toe around it, so he removed his arm from the back of his head and turned to his side as well. The stars could wait. He searched Billy’s eyes, smiling at the genuine curiosity lying behind them. Admired the way they reflected the moonlight._

_“‘cause they’re the color of your eyes.”_

_And Billy’s eyes shined with something more, seemed more ocean-like, Steve felt so lost in its depths but found himself all the more enchanted by the charmer’s sparkling laughter filling the air and his lungs._

_“I like your eyes too,” was all he said._

_Hope soared within Steve, maybe this was something more, maybe it meant something different. But for now, he stayed in the silence, enjoying being able to stare at Billy’s face for a little while longer before his inevitable leave. They were almost touching._

_Those words were almost something. They were almost like something more. Almost._

Steve smiles to himself remembering that night. It was only last week, when they’d gotten drunk, but it feels like it was much closer.

He notices how Billy asks him questions a lot, a curious soul. But he thinks he knows why.

It could be that Billy wants to know him more, because he knows Billy so well already.

Their conversations are always nice, Billy’s always so much quieter with Steve and more patient. He knows Steve gets overwhelmed easily.

But Steve knows to be patient, as well. He knows Billy can be a bit short-tempered at times. He can tell when Billy’s mad.

As the bell rings and Steve gets up, he looks at Billy’s empty desk and the many scratches near the edges. Sometimes, when Billy’s thinking too much, he scratches his desk with his stationery.

It’s soft enough that nobody can really hear it, but Steve catches it when he’s listening for it. It’s like another sense. And then Steve would take him away after class and they’d smoke or talk about it. Or both, if Billy was willing enough.

Steve grabs his books and leaves the classroom. He gets knocked aside by a student but keeps his ground.

If Billy were here, Billy would be fuming.

He notices how Billy gets protective of him. Remembers when somebody from basketball kicked him in the hip on accident and Billy started basically barking at the poor kid.

Sometimes, when Billy’s angry, he licks his teeth a lot more often or the tips of his ears get really red. It’s hard to notice, but when Billy gets aggressive and whips his head around often, Steve can then easily catch the flush red of those ears.

Billy’s also a little insecure about his ears, he used to be picked on for them. Steve thinks they’re really pretty and cute, loves it when Billy’s feeling confident enough to come to school with hair tucked behind one and a striking piercing on display.

And Billy likes letting Steve play with it if it’s long or big enough, Steve knows he finds comfort when Steve’s near. And they’re always almost touching.

It’s all so dreamy.

Steve feels like he should be waking up sometimes, but he’s pretty sure he’s stuck in this dream. And he’s completely fine with it.

Because his hands are far too big, but he knows they slot almost perfectly with Billy’s.

_“Okay, so you’re gonna raise your hands, like this,” Steve raises both of his hands in front of him as he speaks._

_Billy repeats the pose, sitting cross legged across from him. Their knees are almost touching._

_“I have no idea what I’m doing, Steve,” Billy confesses stupidly._

_Steve laughs ever so sweetly. The sunshine lights up Billy’s features so nicely, follows the contour of his cheeks gorgeously and frames his face just right. If only the blinds weren’t half closed. Then Steve could admire all he wanted._

_He almost got to see all those freckles in the earliest of mornings._

_“Patty cake! Now, you do this…”_

_He brings his left hand halfway but waits. “You have to meet me halfway,” he says._

_Billy nods slowly then suddenly, his face beams with mischief._

_Steve narrows his eyes but before he can comment on the sudden enthusiasm, Billy’s right hand swoops in and laces its fingers with his._

_“Oh--!” “Now your hand is stuck, and we can’t play patty cake.”_

_His face goes a little pink from this gesture, but he smiles nevertheless. “But I still have my other hand!”_

_It’s a challenge. He knows it._

_Billy’s hand reaches out before Steve can snap his right hand away, and now they’re both holding hands real tightly on the carpet of Steve’s bedroom._

_“Shit,” he mutters under his breath._

_The butterflies swimming in his stomach don’t calm down any, his mind’s completely empty and all he can do is savor the feeling of Billy’s hands in his. It feels so natural, feels so right._

_“There, I don’t want to play whatever that game was. It sounds stupid,” Billy said._

_Steve chuckled breathlessly and nodded, “It wasn’t, but okay.”_

_He rubs his left thumb over Billy’s knuckle as gently as possible, testing the waters even though he knew full well it was just for himself because he really liked this closeness._

_Abruptly, Billy pulls both his hands away like he’s been burnt and laughs awkwardly. “Right, well- we should probably head to school now.”_

_Dumbfounded, Steve nods. “Yeah. School.”_

_The words come out weirdly like they’re foreign, his tongue almost twists into a knot mid-sentence. A really loose knot. The butterflies hadn’t stopped and his eyes felt heavy with fuzziness._

He finds the bleachers and waits, sits patiently with his hands in his lap and stares at the door expectantly.

And without fail, he knows Billy will always come through.

And the dirty blonde does.

Clad in his usual gangster-like get-up, Billy slams through the doors eagerly. His smile is fresh as day when his blue eyes find Steve’s brown ones.

Nobody’s in the gym to witness Billy stride then run over and slide to his knees at Steve’s legs. He lets his head lie on Steve’s thigh with an admiring smile and sparkling eyes.

“Hey,” Billy says like a dork.

Steve snorts, Billy said it was cute once and Steve’s forced Nancy to get used to the sound not too long after, “Hey.”

“Missed you,” Billy confesses when he sits up and places himself next to Steve. Steve finds himself missing the weight of Billy’s head on his thighs, wishes he ran his hands through those golden locks before he moved.

Instead he smiles, leans back a bit to get a better view at Billy, who’s so close to him but not quite touching. “Missed you too,” he manages.

He knows it’s only been a morning. Not that long at all since they last saw each other. But he noticed that Billy loves being near him, and he noticed that Billy’s eyes shine differently around him, and he noticed that Billy’s smiles and questions are more relaxed around him. Steve noticed, about himself, that the same kind of applies to him as well when he’s with Billy.

Steve leans in a little closer, more daring. When they’re apart it feels so disconnecting, it bothers Billy but it makes Steve happy because he knows where Billy is anyways. And he knows, even after fights, Billy returns to him. He knows that at the end of the day, it’ll be Billy’s voice he falls asleep to. It’s just not quite the face he wakes up to. Not yet.

They’re almost there, just not quite close enough.

Their thighs touch finally, sending sparks up Steve’s spine but most of all giving him the flutters again.

“How was class?” Billy asks. His breath definitely smells of smoke, but he still has the lingering scent of perfume from last night as well. It makes Steve’s heart fill.

Those questions weren’t uncommon, Billy asks about Steve’s day a lot. Asks him questions, a lot. He notices.

When he looks away to find Billy’s hand resting weightlessly over his pocket, he knows that Billy’s feeling particularly good today. His pocket looks empty, it means he only brought one cigarette to school. It means he was planning to hang out with Steve after skipping class and listen to whatever Steve has to say. It means today, he just wants to be around Steve.

Today, Steve just wants to be around Billy as well.

“It was boring,” Steve answers and looks back up. He sees that Billy’s looking down at his lips again, and smiles just for him. A smile nobody else sees but Billy.

He thinks Billy might like his lips, now that he thinks about it.

“Yeah?” Billy continues, eyes going back to Steve’s. They were pulling Steve in, they were opening him up and analyzing him. In the sweetest way possible.

Like, they were tugging his soul and kissing his beating heart tenderly. They were, really tender.

He feels so vulnerable and bare in front of Billy. He doesn’t mind feeling that way. He can’t imagine feeling that way with anyone else.

His heart isn’t going crazy. The butterflies aren’t overly swarming him. The feelings are there though. He feels fuzzy, all at once like he’s in a dream. His eyes feel like cotton, just like his whole body, and all he can focus on is Billy. All he gravitates towards is Billy.

He feels content, happy, almost in love.

“Yeah. I was hoping to see you after.”

“You’re seeing me now,” Billy says casually.

“I am,” Steve breathes happily. It’s a tone that makes Billy look at him so dearly, makes Billy’s lashes look longer than usual in the way they flutter. Makes Billy smile in a way that his eyes crinkle at the corners, a way that brings his cheekbones more definition and his lips stretch like clouds parting in the prettiest of ways.

Oh, now he sees the sun.

“You wanna skip? Been awhile,” Billy asks almost nervously.

The jittery, fluttery feeling comes to Steve again, makes his lungs fill with such beautiful, refreshing air and makes the natural world around him smell so much nicer. His heart gently picks up when he decides why not and reaches over to take Billy’s hand in his.

They slot together perfectly.

“Definitely.”

Billy doesn’t move away this time, just smiles at him and pulls him a little closer. They’re almost kissing, but they’re not quite touching yet.

It’s almost love, in the way they dance around their feelings so in tune with each other. It’s almost love in the way they later laugh at a dumb joke in the Camaro that Steve’s come to look at as a second home. It’s almost love in the fact that to Steve, Billy’s his first home. His first and last relic and star in this world that he’s still figuring out the shape and edges of.

It’s almost like he’s in love, in the way he breathes Billy’s name later on when they’re out of the car calling each other ‘buddy’ with their hands still interlocked. It’s almost love in Billy’s eyes when they look to Steve as he snorts yet again at another dumb joke.

It’s almost love.

**Author's Note:**

> tumblr is nancywrote!
> 
> thank you for reading and i hope you enjoyed!! <33


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